On a ledge above my kitchen sink, the words of Micah 5:5 are displayed in brilliant white lettering on a lovely dark wooden plaque. “He will be our peace.” This verse is a reminder for me that when my world is spinning, my heart is racing or the plans I make get changed, He doesn’t change and yes, He is my peace.
Sadly there are many days when I don’t live with Michah 5:5 as a banner waving over me. Like the morning I was just making my move toward the shower when the doorbell rang. My daughter was in the kitchen still in her nightgown and she hurriedly tip toed down the hallway to me and whispered, “It’s a couple of guys!”.
In case it’s a couple of “bad” guys, I instinctively grab my phone and a plastic tube. The phone to call for help. And the tube because I am a girl who can plan for worst case scenarios practically instantaneously.
We stand breathing quietly and listening in the hallway. And the phone in my hand rings. Do bad guys call before entering a home? “This is Jill” I answer curtly.
Turns out it’s three kitchen-counter-guys who have come to fix my leaky sink. And the one calling tells me they had called earlier to tell me they were on their way and their boss had also called yesterday to let me know they would be coming early today. I’m not convinced.
I am wrapped in a towel. My daughter is in a short nightgown. Without thinking I tell him that this is unexpected and unacceptable. I am just getting into the shower and they will have to wait. Listening to what I say to them, my daughter just looks at me with a shocked expression on her face.
The sink fixing guys wait while I shower and get dressed. Yes, the world revolves around me today. Still annoyed, I finally let them in.
As they begin working on my sink I go and listen to two voice messages which tell me men will be coming to fix my leaky sink early today. Embarrassed and sheepish I go to them and apologize. Not saying much, they all shrug it off but the truth is….. I was nasty in my initial response and I rudely and selfishly made them wait on my front step for a quarter of an hour. I am ashamed, mortified really, by the ugliness of my self focused heart that was so easily rattled this day.
After they quietly fix my sink and leave, I look at my window ledge which sticks out over the sink where they were working. Prominently on display are the words that today I’m wishing weren’t so boldly displayed.
“He will be our PEACE”
I’m not feeling, thinking, or living these words this morning.
And this realization floods my prone to wander, unsteady heart …. If I’m “peaceful” but only when I have prepared the environment and circumstances to cultivate that peace, it’s not really the “Peace” of Michah 5:5. No, that kind of self manufactured peace meets my temporary needs but it isn’t the deep and lasting Peace that Jesus brings, it’s the peace that Jill brings.
And I decide, declare, and am determined again that I want and need more, so much more, of the One Who is my Peace. Ever grateful to this merciful One who gives a bottomless supply of “do over’s” and forgiveness a-plenty.